Wednesday, September 8, 2010

New year, new things, new resolve, I think.

There is less that is new now, this is the 3rd first week of school that my boys and I have been through together and to be brutally honest it came at exactly the right moment. They were tired of summer and I am was tired of everything.

In fact I would say that I am past tired, I would go as far as to say that I am exhausted. My children, as precious and wonderful as they are, sucked me dry this summer. So dry in fact that I dissolved in a puddle of tears as I argued with my husband over dishes and other household tasks that had become overwhelming to me. It was pretty pitiful fight, me crying, him frustrated because I was unable to hear that really working was not an optional activity and that although I wanted him home more he really did have work 8 or so hours most days. I told you I was tired.

It happens. Parents get run down, we get tired . Yet we expect ourselves to be superhuman.  We push ourselves to keep going, push ourselves because we feel guilty if something falls by the wayside (like the dishes) or something slips through the cracks ( like a missed appointment) or feel like a failure when we hear about all the other things that other parents are doing with their kids over the summer while we are barely keeping it altogether.

Well, here and now I am resolving as this new year begins ( for me the year always starts in September) to let my best be good enough. Parenting is hard and I need to remember that I am doing alright and that should be good enough. I am doing what I can, when I can and my children will have equal number of memories of a Mom who took the time to build bat houses with them the summer of 2010 and the mother who that very same summer told them repeatedly that if they continued to bicker she would tape them together.

J. blogs at Stellar Parenting 101where she is working on feeling less sorry for herself and instead being thankful for the wonder that is parenting.

5 comments:

  1. I am sitting here at 9:38 and the kids are not yet put to bed. Why? Because that would require the effort of me making them put on their PJs, brush their teeth and go to bed and I. just. don't. have. it. in. me. One kid went back to school today for ONE day (and now two days off) the other goes back on Monday (to a brand new school). I am a limp rag. I am a puddle. We are going to watch TV and eat cereal for the next four days. Anything beyond that earns me the mother of the year award. In other words, I know where you are coming from. (and actually we're going to synagogue, and to a family Rosh Hashana lunch and there are play-dates lined up, and... but I WANT to spend the next four days in PJs eating cereal, it's really all I have energy for.)

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  2. I hope you are planning to put them somewhere far away from you before you tape them together :-). That made me LOL! I think our Summer was similar. My oldest is in her third week of school, and the day I've been dreaming of for more than two years - the day my twins will start preschool - is less than a week away. It couldn't come any sooner. I maintain the illusion of being on top of things, but I am buried deep in piles of stuff that needs to be done that just hasn't become urgent yet. It's just an overflowing plate that we all try to carry with grace, so yes...take a few minutes to breathe. My body is insisting on it these days...

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  3. When the kids were small I was the same as you.... wishing he was home more... then there were the perdiems at night that gave us some extra $$$ we needed...
    As they have gotten older, we have our little rut carved out. Our way of doing things... ironically if he's home longer than a day... both they and I, wish he'd go back to work, he's in our space :)

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