Thursday, June 14, 2012

Finding Hope Again

One of the reasons I love writing for Hopeful Parents is because of the name. Writing for a group that calls itself "hopeful" includes, in my view, an implicit charter to write about hope and a hopeful way of life. And by writing about being hopeful once a month, I allow myself to actually be hopeful.

But what do you do when you're not feeling so hopeful?

Seriously. I'm asking.

This is not a post where I tell you the five steps I take when I need to rejuvenate. (An extra five minutes in the shower isn't enough to wash this level of stress away.) Nor is this a story in which a small moment shows me the joy and hope in life.

So I ask you:

What do you do when the behaviors are simply beyond your control?

What do you do when you read the report that tells you that the school your child has been attending for two years is all wrong for him? When you come to truly understand how little progress your now five year old has made since he started school at age three?

What do you do when you have wonderful friends but you have no idea how they can help you? When a night out or a glass of wine, as lovely as they are, simply aren't enough to heal what is broken?

What do you do when it has been years since you've truly had a good night's sleep?

How do you hold together a heart that is breaking, when you want so much to heal and fix and nurture, and all you can do is survive?

How do you get back to hope, when you truly do consider yourself a hopeful parent?

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Jen Bush also writes at her personal blog, Anybody Want A Peanut, where she writes about raising a preschooler with autism, a neurotypical three year old, and a dog on Prozac.

3 comments:

  1. I am sorry you are in this place right now. Be gentle with yourself... we have all been/ are there at on point or an other. The options will still be there when you have the energy to look at them.

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  2. The answer eludes me so often that I cherish the days when I feel like I actually know what to do! I hope things turn around soon.

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