I missed my Hopeful Parents deadline last month.
I haven’t posted on my blog since May.
The writing wheels came to a halt sometime at the end of the school year when I was inundated with school functions, IEP meetings, and the dreaded mediation with the school district -- the usual stuff.
And then my mother’s illness worsened.
The words stayed trapped in my head, swirling and spinning and I avoided putting any of them on paper. Too raw. Too hard.
I flew across country two weeks ago with my family and spent a precious few days with her. The images and conversations from those days both haunt and comfort me. I scrawled some of them into my notebook but I can’t look at them. Not yet.
I know I will write about it. I know I will write about being right there with her when she passed away. I know I will write about how being the parent of a kid with special needs gave me the strength and skills I needed to help her in those last few days. I know I will write about Oscar’s reaction, Ruby’s ease and Abe’s compassion. And I know I will write about our ordinary life again.
But I’m not ready. Not yet.