Mums and Dads of special needs kids often wonder about what life would have been like if their child did not have special needs
Finding out - can feel like as though a giant hand came from above, scooped us up from the and put us on a parallel road.
We glance back at that other road – the one that we thought we were on.
And we think how much easier that road would have been
We imagine our child without the disability -without the struggles and it breaks our heart.
While I truly understand and empathize( truly I do, for I walk in your shoes ) , I also believe this thinking is toxic
This dreaming of the child we were meant to have, blinds us to the beauty of the child we do have.
Not just in the way we think of our child, but even in the way we think of our whole life
It can stop us from recognizing all the goodness of what we do have
For the only alternate realities we imagine are the seemingly better ones
Just take a minute to imagine a few unfortunate alternate realities. Ones in which we are born in poverty or hunger or completely unloved.
And you will see what I mean about there being plenty and goodness in our current universe
The only thing to do is to look at your life and your child, abandoning all preconceived notion of what comprises a happy life
As I type this post - watching "Lie to me" with my husband - my son replaces my laptop ( with himself ) and says "Love ...hug".
This little guy of few words,sure knows how to use them.
I hold him close, I say a prayer of gratitude for this lovely life and this lovely child
How thankful I am, that early on this journey I learned to use my own eyes.
Threw away the old recipe for happiness and wrote my own
Thinking of all alternate realities, of how things are meant to be, is futile
For there is only one reality
And its this one
The one we are in
Live this life
Love this child
K- Floortime Lite Mama blogs about her life and her son at Floortime Lite Mama