Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Six Years Ago

Jeremy and I have been married six years today.

If you had told my fresh-faced, pie-in-the-sky twenty-one year old self some of the things that would happen in the next six years, I might have bolted in the opposite direction.  I had no experience with children with special needs, and to tell you the truth, I felt sorry for people with disabilities.  I certainly didn't think that Iwould ever have a child with special needs.  My children would all be intellectually and athletically brilliant, and they would speak multiple languages due to living in so many exotic locales.  Oh, and I would be an English professor and a renowned author by now, not unemployed and still without a graduate degree.  And Jeremy certainly would never be injured; the man was indestructible.  Those sorts of things were what happened to other people so that there was enough material for the Lifetime Movie Network to stay in business. 

I was, in many ways, the kind of person that drives me absolutely bonkers now. 

And so I'm nowhere near where I thought I would be when Jeremy and I made those vows.  But I'm someplace better, as far as I'm concerned.  I've learned that it isn't what you do in life that matters. Things that can be written down on a resume don't really have a whole lot of worth for me anymore-- especially when it comes to my child's accomplishments.  I'm much more concerned with living a satisfied, fulfilling life, and I think the things necessary for that don't require advanced degrees or material goods.  And in those things, things like love and human kindness and having a sense of purpose, I have become rich.  Jeremy and I have an indestructible bond now that I think comes from learning these things together.

I am an incredibly lucky woman married to an extraordinary man.  I'm not going to speculate where we'll be in another six years, because I've learned my lesson there.  But I'm sure it will be somewhere worth going.



You can find Jess over at her blog, Connor's Song.


  1. Wishing you a joyous anniversary. Your perspective is so wonderful and reflects how **I** feel, too, about my own marriage. We're nowhere near where we envisioned ourselves all those years ago, but we're in a better, more grounded place.

  2. Happy Anniversary to a remarkable couple! You are quite an inspiration to many, and I love your perspective. Yes. Yes. and Yes!

  3. That was a very beautiful post. Happy Anniversary!

  4. Congratulations! We just celebrated our 9th anniversary. Every time I see one of our wedding photos I look at my young bride face and shake my head. I had no idea what I was getting into. I remember some of the things I spent my days worrying about at that age and just laugh. It was such a simple and carefree time. Like you I'm glad to be wiser, more experienced, and in many ways happier than I was parading around in that white dress.

  5. Happy Anniversary Jess!
    I've just celebrated my 10th anniversary and I've got to be honest with you, with the birth of a preemie eight months after our wedding, our life hasn't been exactly how we imagined it either. But, like you, I have a good life that I wouldn't trade for any starry-eyed daydreams...