All summer long I wait.
I wait for that first day of school. I wait to figure out what quirky things have come up over the Summer that the schools will need to address to get and help the kids stay on track.
I also wait for the other shoe to drop. My son is entering middle school this year and we're grateful we were able to get him into a private school for kids with learning differences (thank you state scholarship!).
As of today, we're only day 3 into it for him but I find myself still not quite exhaling. New people, uniform, switching classes, higher intensity and new requirements. It is for sure that our public school would have also had the same pressures (sans uniform) but since my son doesn't have anything to compare it to, I fear he will shut down and blame not liking school on this particular school.
See? While I have anxiety for his and his sister's situation, I'm still full of hope each and every new school year.
I am stunned by this, all of a sudden.
I'm stunned that through everything we've been through that I still believe our kids can have a successful year by growing and learning and participating. If I didn't, I suppose I might want to crawl under a rock for a very long school year.
I am finding that I thinking a lot about the word Hope. I am a Person Who Hopes, but does it somewhat privately. It's because I try to be realistic too and I suppose that makes me a sometimes Closeted Person Who Hopes, all the while I am pushing the hope down.
"Keep the hope low, because something is around the corner and it will blow up, you know it will!" I tell myself.
I probably am thinking about this a lot because...I hope he gets some confidence in this environment, I hope the IEP is in place and being implemented, I hope that they can hold it together, I hope the other kids don't tease them for their differences...I hope...I hope!
I think about hope because the kids make me. I'm sure it's their undeniable spirits; especially during the times that they want to participate in life fully. I think that all of our kids with differences...all of them, Our kids, they're amazing.
So every year about this time I'm thinking, "This is it! This is the year!"
I hope. Well, I want to hope.
Julia blogs her family's story at Kidneys and Eyes and owns a social networking site for special needs at Support for Special Needs. You can find her drinking diet coke, working to pay insurance premiums and vintage photo collecting. Her social media portal is Slice of Crazy Pie. Clearly named for her life.