Control.

This is my least favorite time of year.

Summer ends. School starts.

Routines are trashed and rebuilt.

Everything is new.

Not good for a kid with autism. Or his mom.

He's getting a new self-contained teacher, and a new teacher for second grade. He's going from the relaxed state of summer to the structure of school, the pressures of therapy and learning, and the social expectations of school.

Basically, we will both be thrown out of our comfort zone.

I worry about him, how he'll handle it, how the year will go...

Then I realize, I have to learn to let go. I can't control this.

And that's what it's all about. Controlling everything. And that's not life, as much as I want it to be. It makes our life easier, sure... but I can't do it forever.

So this year on the first day of school, I will take a deep breath, and just hope for the best. I will not imagine everything that could possibly go wrong. I will be okay with just taking care of any problems when they happen, and not worry about everything beforehand.

Wish me luck.
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Kate is a parent to two awesome kids, one who happens to have autism. She blogs at Okay, who turned out the lights?.