Saturday, May 2, 2015

Child Whisperers


I am the mother of two children diagnosed with special needs.

But I am not a parent.

Yes, you read that right, I am NOT a parent.

At least not in the ordinary sense of the word.

To me, parenting is about educating your children and providing them with instruction and social conditioning so that one day they may acclimate into the world and conform to what society expects of them.

For a long time that is exactly what I tried to do.

I became a parent like any other and tried to condition my children, to mold them into society.

I pounded and pounded on my square pegs trying to fit them into unaccommodating round holes.

The end result of all this pounding was nothing more than splintered wood.

There was costly damage inflicted upon all of us.


On my journey to raise unique children, I am beginning to believe that I must redefine my ideas about parenting.

Or at least what this role means to me.

Is it my job to mold what is un-moldable?

To search for a "place" for my children that does not exist?

To send them into a world that does not know them?

It all sounds like madness to me.


 And so I search to create my own definition of parenthood.

What does it mean to be a parent of a child diagnosed with special needs?

In this role, when and what am I doing that feels right?

After 16 years of special needs parenting, I can tell you, without a doubt, that it is when I assume the role of an observer that the magic begins.

It is when I watch them.

When I really, really study them, noticing the small things that they do or say that seem to speak so loudly.

Only when I am enlightened, and educated,

am I helpful to my children.

I listen instead of lecture.

It is when I assume a passive role, that I move forward.

In this role, I am not the parent or at least not the one doing the educating.

It is counter intuitive, feeling a lot like parenting in reverse.

But as an observer, I have learned many things from my children.

They seem to know instinctively of life and love and sing of the simple things.

They value things like honesty, love and togetherness.

They possess warm spirits and pure hearts.

Their messages are the medicine the world lacks.


I do not believe my children are alone in this knowledge.

I believe many parents feel similarly.

That our children are trying to tell us something.

But how do children diagnosed with special needs, many who cannot express or speak, communicate these powerful lessons?

I have learned that it is through me.

That this is my job as a parent.

I am not preparing my children for the world

but instead am being conditioned

to prepare the world for them.

To do this, I must not only be an observer of my children, but also a translator for them.

I must take the foreign language my children speak and translate it into English, breaking it down into small understandable parts so others may hear their beautiful songs.

This is my job as a parent.

I am not raising my children.

I am raising the world.....helping it to learn how to see children who are different.

I must teach the world to value these special souls, to accept them, to learn their unusual language.

For their language has a vibration that seems to resonate in those seeking a more meaningful life.

In becoming more loving and accepting of those who are unable to help themselves, perhaps in a way we begin to heal and love ourselves?

Perhaps we begin to heal the world?

I am not a parent.

I am an observer and translator

a teacher

a child whisperer

an awakener of the world.

 
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Lisa Peters writes about family life at www.onalifelessperfect.blogspot.com

5 comments:

  1. "I am so happy to share this wonderful testimony about Dr Brave, my name is Mellisa Jefferson I am 34 years old, I live in Florida united states, I am happily married to Sowers Jefferson with three kids we got married in 2006 I am a banker but due to some certain family conditions I had to quit my job so I could have time for my family my husband works in a construction company not long ago around may 2015 my husband started to behave in a way i could not understand, i was very Confused by the way he treat me and the Kids. Later that month he did not come home again and he called me that he want a divorce, i asked him what have i Done wrong to deserve this from him, all he was saying is that he want a divorce That he hate me and do not want to see Me again in his life, i was mad and also Frustrated do not know what to do,i was Sick for more than 4 weeks because of the divorce. i love him so much he was everything to me without him my life is Incomplete. i told my sister and she told me to contact a spell caster, i never believed in all this spell casting of a thing. i just want to try if something will come out of it. i contacted Dr Brave for the return of my husband to me, he told me that my husband have Been taken by another woman, that she cast a spell on him that is why he hate me and also want us to divorce. then he told me that he have to cast a spell on him that will make him return to Me and the kids, he casted the spell and After 27hours my husband called me and He told me that i should forgive him, he Started to apologize on phone and said That he still loves me that he did not know what happen to him that he left me. it was the spell that Dr Brave on him that brought him back to me today, i and my family Are now happy again today. thank you Dr Brave for what you have done for me i would have been nothing Today if not for your great spell. i want You my friends who are passing through All this kind of love problem of getting Back their husband, wife , or ex boyfriend and girlfriend to contact him on this email: bravespellcaster@gmail.com , web site:http://enchantedscents.tripod.com/lovespell/ . and you will see that your problem will be solved Without any delay or effect cell number +2348072370762 Thanks for reading. ."

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  2. That’s really very good thing in your blog I like that!! Mary M

    ReplyDelete
  3. I am here to give testimony of how i got back my husband, we got married for over 9 years and we had two kids. thing were going well with us and we where always happy. until one day my husband started to behave in a way i could not understand, i was very confused by the way he treated me and the kids. later that month he did not come back home again and he called me that he want a divorce, i asked him what have i done wrong to deserve this from him, all he was saying is that he want a divorce that he hate me and do not want to see me again in his life, i was mad and also frustrated do not know what to do,i was sick for more than 2 weeks because of the divorce. i love him so much he was everything to me without him my life is incomplete. i told my sister and she told me to contact a spell caster, i never believe in all this spell casting of a thing. i just want to try if something will come out of it. i contacted traditional spell hospital for the return of my husband to me, they told me that my husband have been taken by another woman, that she cast a spell on him that is why he hate me and also want us to divorce. then they told me that they have to cast a spell on him that will make him return to me and the kids, they casted the spell and after 1 week my husband called me and he told me that i should forgive him, he started to apologize on phone and said that he still live me that he did not know what happen to him that he left me. it was the spell that he casted on him that make him come back to me. my family and i are now happy again. Thank you Dr. Aluta for what you have done for me i would have been nothing today if not for your great spell. i want you my friends who are passing through all this kind of love problem of getting back their husband, wife , or ex boyfriend and girlfriend to contact traditionalspellhospital@gmail.com and you will see that your problem will be solved without any delay. He cast spells for different purposes like
    (1) If you want your ex back.
    (2) if you always have bad dreams.
    (3) You want to be promoted in your office.
    (4) You want women/men to run after you.
    (5) If you want a child.
    (6) You want to be rich.
    (7) You want to tie your husband/wife to be yours forever.
    (8) If you need financial assistance.
    (9) Herbal care
    (10) is the only answer to that your problem of winning the lottery
    Contact him today on: traditionalspellhospital@gmail.com

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  4. Dear Lisa,
    that would be a great blog for all parents to read.
    What an eloquent, moving post.
    thank you,
    Seth Kanor

    ReplyDelete