The other day I was on a bike ride with some friends. We were climbing Lookout Mountain in Colorado. I was feeling somewhat puny and ready for the climb to be over. I let my eye wander to the two radio towers on top of the mountain; one slightly higher than the other.
"Which one do I focus on?" I said to a friend.
"Yeah, which tower is the top? When do I know I'll be done?"
"Heather, you know when you're climbing you don't look at the top. You keep your eyes on the road in front of you."
Right.....eyes on the road in front of you.
Samantha turns four this month. Four....she is no longer a baby. We finally replaced her crib with a hospital-style bed. The baby-jogger I have put her in for years is starting to look a little small and we have an order pending for a wheel chair.
I can still carry her with ease....most of the time but I find myself bracing a little more. My arms get a little tired and her legs hang over my lap when I try to cuddle.
Because she going to be four.
Looking to the next four years is a little daunting. Samantha will only get bigger, god-willing, but also meaning that our house will require lifts, we will need a van or a bigger vehicle. Moving a child who does not move herself will only become more complex.
But in keeping with my biking advice, I've decided not to look at the top of that hill. To keep my eyes on the road in front of me and focus on the joy of a four year old. Maybe I'll even find a spot or two where I can coast.
Four?!!! Holy Cow.
Heather Schichtel is a mom, writer and advocate to her daughter Samantha. You can follow their story at Samsmom