I drank too many beers last night.

I sat in a bar with some of my amazing female friends for FOUR HOURS!  (I certainly can't remember the last time I did that!)

I am currently on vacation.  Out of pocket.  By Myself.  As in, there are no children or a husband here.

I was coming quite close to one of those I've-had-it-up-to-here moments (which actually makes it sound a lot milder than it felt) about a month ago and was sort of consumed with the fact that I seem to just do what everyone else dictates I'll do and not what I want to do.  It was a mixture of total self-pity,feeling like I've lost my identity, and needing to put on my big girl panties and plan something all by my wee little self without weighing in on anyone's opinions about it.  Silly in many ways, but I needed to do it.  I scheduled my mother-in-law to come in as backup since I knew that would make my case a lot stronger with the other half.  I booked myself a plane ticket.  I took very little shit about going on this trip, not that it wasn't dished out; and I did not allow myself to feel guilty about going.

My best friend from 9th grade recently got a divorce and is starting her life anew.  Yesterday she closed on the house she and her ex owned and I helped her get settled into her new, adorable place.  We picked out pillows and rugs, dish soap and shoe racks.  We ate lunch at a cafe and even had wine.  It was so wonderful to be with her and to help her start down this new path, and even more wonderful that we had no place to be (other than the pub at 6 pm!) and no one to answer to. 

I slept until 10 am today.

I am going to get a pedicure.

I am going to drink wine tonight and listen to live music.

And on Monday I will go home.  I will be refreshed.  I will be thrilled to see my boys.  And I will be ready to care of them because I have taken care of me.