Lucky
Stimey | Tuesday, December 15, 2009 at 8:00AM My special needs child is six years old. That means he's been in the special education system for about three years. Yet, somehow it seems like I've been doing it forever.
In those three short years we've fought for my son Jack's autism diagnosis, fought to get him the right services, done endless evaluations and observations, combed through more reports and IEPs than I care to remember, hired an educational consultant and an attorney to get him those right services, and endured many phone calls and notes home from the school about the things he's doing there—both good and bad.
It seems like we've been fighting and struggling for so long.
And there is still so much to do.
Through it all though, we have somehow managed to luck into the best group of people who are looking out for Jack. Even last year when we were sitting in a high pressure IEP meeting with our attorney and educational consultant and were battling it out with the county over what Jack needed to be able to succeed in school, I felt as if the people directly responsible for his education and well-being really wanted to do right by him.
Part of this is due to Jack's amazing charisma and my entire family's efforts to be a cooperative, helpful, amiable part of his team. But a big part of it is that the administration and staff at his school are incredibly good people.
I was reminded of this last week when I was dealing with a pretty serious situation with the school. I really don't want to go into details, but it was something that could have been extremely volatile if the administration were not so amazingly understanding about Jack and his disability.
I have heard so many horror stories over the past three years from people whose children are in other schools. I've heard good things too, but c'mon, every single one of us here knows how hard it is, even under the best of circumstances. I don't know how I got so lucky.
Jack has teachers that welcome me into his classroom every week. He has a principal that will hug me and cry with me when I need it. Jack's school environment is such that I have never questioned that he is wanted and valued in his mainstream classroom.
No, they're not perfect. But neither am I and neither is Jack. (Although he's close.) But Jack has a team that understands that even if I have to be a squeaky wheel that I am doing it for the good of my child and they understand that.
How lucky am I? But, also, how unfortunate that I have to feel lucky to have such a situation. All of our children should be afforded this help, support, understanding, love, and acceptance.
I wish for all of us that we are able to find these environments for our children that help us get the support and respect that they deserve.
Stimey blogs about her life with Jack and her two other children at Stimeyland. There, she tries to see the humor in it all. She also runs an autism-related events calendar for Montgomery County, Maryland, at AutMont.
autism, special education, special needs 
Reader Comments (2)
I'm sure it's more than just luck for you. You work hard, advocate effectively, never get complacent -- good job!
You ARE very lucky indeed! We had the kind of caring teachers you mention before we moved. Made the crappy system we are dealing with in the new state and the subsequent regression of my son all that much more difficult to swallow.
So my advice to you is...DON'T EVER LEAVE A GOOD THING! I kick myself daily for our mistake :(